Gandalf: says fuck but only for dramatic effect
Aragorn: too cool to say fuck except when he stubs his toe kicking orc helmets
Boromir: his dad told him he could only say it once so he’s saving it
Gimli: is too classy to say fuck
Legolas: knows about fuck but is too dense to understand why someone would use it as a curse word
Sam: rarely says fuck & is always mortified when it slips out
Frodo: legally cannot say fuck
Merry: sometimes says fuck but prefers other swears
Pippin: says fuck constantly like he’s trying to prove something
Faramir: also believed his dad & uses his 1 Fuck To Give to cuss his dad out on his deathbed
Éowyn: is too scared to say fuck until she kills the Witch King, when she loses all fear & strikes terror into the hearts of men with her foul language
Gollum: only says fuck
Galadriel: shocks everyone by saying fuck; has way better comedic timing than Gandalf
Celeborn: doesn’t say fuck & facepalms every time his wife says it
Bilbo: made the law about Frodo but says fuck all the time
who says fuck?
Published
Plot Designing 